High Heel Hijinks

Where in the blog did I go...

2010-04-23T21:56:00.002-04:00

Nowhere really.

I've come down with a nasty case of...blogger's block and am currently looking for a cure. Any doctors in the house?

I like to self diagnose if I can so I took to the trusty world wide web and literally searched for "blogger's block symptoms." Turns out I'm not alone. We are a large group of sickies all suffering in the name of the written (or in this case typed) word. Some call it "blogstipation" but I am a gal and gals don't get blogstipated, right?

My symptoms started about three weeks ago. My fingers become listless, my head became clouded and overrun with visions of grocery lists, piling laundry, dirty bathrooms and house guests. I'll suddenly think, "Oh I'll tell them about that funny time I" and then nothin'. I sit to type it out and instead start searching for a great enchilada recipe (anyone have one, while I'm thinking of it?).

You'll be happy to know that now that I have been diagnosed, I am seeking professional help. Through a strict regimen of intense therapy and heavy drinking, I am expected to make a full recovery. Whew! Hope I didn't have you too worried there!

Wait, hold the phone, I just wrote a blog post, maybe I'm cured! Next time, I'll tell you about that time that I.......................oh, wait, I forgot.

Hope you have a kickin' weekend,

Shoe Gal

Going to my happy place...

2010-04-01T19:09:00.000-04:00

To quote a song by these guys: New York, I love you, but you're bringing me down.

You got that right.

For the last week, The Big City has been bleary, dreary and downright depressing. We've had cloudy skies, plenty of rain and chilly temperatures. It's the kind of days where you want to put on your fluffiest socks and hide under your blanket with hot cocoa (with mini marshmallows of course). Which I did. Every day.

It's about the time that I mentally pack up and go to my happy place.

a place where you read a magazine from start to finish without any interruptions.

a place where you can take a nap where you want and when you want and no one will bother you.

a place where you can stop and take in the scenery.

a place where humans and animals peacefully co-exist.

a place where your shadow comes out to play.

a place where bonfires and ghost stories are in abundance.

a place where you can kick up your feet and just go where the wind takes you.

a place I love.

Where is your happy place?

I don't have the energy so here is some random crap...weekend edition

2010-03-27T00:08:00.002-04:00

I don't have the energy to come up with a witty, brilliantly written blog post to kick off the weekend, so I figured I would just write a bunch of random things and hope you'll come back next week when I'm back on my game. Pretty please? With a shot of Tequila on top?

1. "Lost" has me, well lost. Anyone else feel me? I have faithfully watched for 6 seasons now and with only a few episodes left, this is what I know so far: there was a plane, it crashed on an island, some people survived, there are "others" on the island, Hurley keeps getting fatter even though he is stranded on an island (hello writers?), there seems to be a butt load of guns (where did they come from? Did they fed-ex them in?), a man named Jacob, a random submarine and once I believe a polar bear. Awesome.

2. John Hughes was the bomb (does anyone say that anymore? no? damn, I'm still uncool). Anyone who can make Molly Ringwald appear cringe-worthingly awkward regardless if she is the rich, popular gal, the gal from the wrong side of the tracks or the gal pining after the popular jock boy is cinematic genius. Plus you can never go wrong with this and this. Gets me every time. Classic.

3. My 10 year high school reunion is coming up this year. I suddenly have the need for a strong drink.

4. I have a weird aversion to salsa. It literally makes me gag if I smell it or see it. I have no recollection of having any type of traumatic experience with salsa yet I can't stand to be within 50 feet of it. Any therapists out there want to weigh in on this one? In other news, I could eat cheese for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Plus a snack. Cheese is good for the soul I say.

5. My favorite childhood book is Harold and the Purple Crayon. Being able to draw the world the way you want - awesome. Shoe stores and Starbucks for all!

6. I love clipping coupons - love love love it. Cutting out that little paper square, filing it in my organizer (yes, I have one and it's color coded to boot) and knowing that next time I hit up the grocery store I'm gonna get fifty cents off Texas Toast and a dollar off Fruity Pebbles and I don't even eat Texas Toast or Fruity Pebbles. But if I did, I'd be doing it for a dollar fifty less than most people. Score.

7. When I was little my dad would tell me and my siblings that he actually wrote the song "Twist and Shout" by the Beatles except he titled it "Spin and Yell". I believed him. I was one of those kids.

8. My biggest pet peeve is soap bubbles left in the sink. If there are soap bubbles, I will stand there and turn the water on and off to make them go down the drain. Seriously, any therapists out there?

9. I wish I could draw. I am jealous of someone who can draw an elephant and it looks like an elephant. I draw an elephant and it looks like a 4 year old's version of an elephant. But I still like to pretend I can draw until someone asks me to draw something for them. Then I'm all like "oh my carpal tunnel is acting up, my pencils aren't sharpened, I think my fingers are broken." Fail.

10. I can't think of anything else to write except so I'll leave you with this fun fact: every second Americans collectively eat one hundred pounds of chocolate. I believe I contribute at least twenty pounds of that. Chocolate is also good for the soul.

Love and shoes,

SG

Cooking Culinary Concoctions With Mr. Converse

2010-03-25T21:53:00.000-04:00

Say that 5 times fast. I dare ya.

So lately, Mr. Converse has been feeling the pull of the kitchen. It has been quietly calling him, beckoning him to it's gleaming (with smudgy finger prints) stainless steel, smooth (if you don't count the crumbs and I don't) granite and bulging cabinets full of delicious delicacies (ok, let's be serious - I'm lucky if I grocery shop once a month).

For the past couple of weeks, Mr. Converse will randomly call me up and say "hey goddess divine (hey it's my blog, I can embellish if I want, don't judge me), pick a recipe and I'll cook it for you tonight." And then I'll be like, "say what? did I just hear you correctly? you, the man who still isn't sure how to turn our oven on is going to whip me up a culinary feast?"

And he did. Three times. He ain't stupid. He knows the way to any respectable gal's heart is through her stomach.

Score one for wives everywhere.

And Mr. Converse may have scored those nights as well...

Oh Lordy, did I just type that? Sorry Mom.

All the best (shoes),

Shoe Gal

I see London, I see France...

2010-03-19T00:58:00.000-04:00

I see Shoe Gal and Mr. Converse's upcoming vaca via a rad pictograph (wow, lame-o. My deepest apologies).

So anyway, if anyone is still reading this (and I don't blame you if you're not), in a little less than a month, a few hours and some change, Shoe Gal and Mr. Converse will be leavin' on a

headed to

where they will have a spot of tea with

and tell their funniest jokes to

they will then hop on a

and end up in

where they will see

and fingers crossed (for Shoe Gal's sake)

and definitely do this

they will visit many

and partake in lots of

and even more

where inevitably Shoe Gal will get one of these

but all she needs is a little

and all will be right with the world again.

au revoir pour le moment,

S.G.

If these boots were made for talkin'...

2010-03-14T23:24:00.001-04:00

I'd be in trouble.

I am a lover of shoes. A connoisseur if you will. My mother calls me a "shoe hoe" (that's done wonders for my reputation). I have an obscene number of footwear in my closet. So obscene that Mr. Converse has been relegated to storing his Converse elsewhere.

But they are all a part of me. They have supported me, taken me places near and far, been a part of some of the most important moments in my life and helped me create what I hope are lasting footprints.

Ok, I'm done with the philosophical mumbo jumbo.

So in honor of shoes everywhere, all shapes, sizes, colors and styles, I thought I would share a few of my favorite pairs that have adorned my tootsies over the years.

My throwback to the 60's stilettos. Groovy and far out.

Disco fever baby.

Over 13 years old but they're still kickin' (pun intended). I wore these shoes to my 9th grade date dance. But I still wear them to this day. A good pair of black heels never goes out of style, I say.

Confucius say: every gal should own a pair of red heels.

My "I do" shoes.

So, I'll leave you with this wise quote from the one and only Mr. Manolo Blahnik, “You put high heels on and you change.” Well said sir.

Kick-ass gals...

2010-03-13T16:45:00.003-05:00

Did you know that March is Women's History Month?

A month to celebrate all of the kick-ass gals who came before us, who broke down barriers, overcame obstacles, paved roads, blazed trails, well you get the picture.

So to honor these rad gals, I thought I would bring to your attention a few that empower me to get out there and kick some ass as well.

In a totally random, no particular order kind of way:

Jane Austen

This bad-ass broad was way ahead of her time. In the 19th century, books were written by men and there certainly were no strong-willed, sassy gals in those pages. But Ms. Austen said "hell to the no!" (or probably something more like "Good sir, hath helleth to the noeth") and did her own thing creating some of the most memorable female characters of all time. I mean how can you not love Elizabeth Bennet for unflinchingly telling Mr. Darcy to stick it where the sun don't shine. Priceless, my friends, priceless.

Marie Curie

I know you're all like, "Shoe Gal, really? Marie whosa whatsa?" Well hear me out. Picture it: 4th grade, biography day. Every other girl chooses Betsy Ross and I wasn't about to be one of 15 little gals walking around with a bonnet on their head and toting around an American flag all day. So I chose Madam Curie and to this day, a couple decades later, I still remember her as a kick-ass gal and here's why. She was the first woman to ever receive a Nobel prize and the first person to receive two Nobel prizes. She discovered two elements. Not one, but two. Under her direction, the world's first studies were conducted into the treatment of cancers. She was voted the "Most inspirational woman in science" in a 2009 poll. Pretty kick-ass if you ask me.

Julia Child

I may be a little biased here as I just watched Julie and Julia a couple of weeks ago. But ever since the credits rolled, Julia Child's kick-ass culinary skills have made me want to whip up Boeuf Bourguignon and Coq au Vin all while yelling "Bon appétit!" every couple of minutes (yeah, that wouldn't get annoying). She brought French cooking to the American masses and made it an art form. She has some pretty memorable quotes that I think sums up why she is a kick-ass gal:

"I think every woman should have a blowtorch."

"Always remember: If you're alone in the kitchen and you drop the lamb, you can always just pick it up. Who's going to know?"

"The only real stumbling block is fear of failure. In cooking you've got to have a 'What the hell?' attitude."

Well said, Julia, well said.

Betty White

Even though this Golden Girl is still alive and kicking ass and takin' names, she certainly gets a high-five from me. Not only can I turn on the TV in the middle of the night when Mr. Converse is next to me sawing logs to hang with her, Dorthy, Sophia and Blanche and laugh my tuccus off, but this 88 years young gal's career is better than ever. For Pete's sake (and I don't even know Pete) she's hosting SNL in a couple of months! So this month I'm gonna thank her for being a friend.

I know there are about a bajillion more kick-ass gals out there who deserve a shout-out and I tip my heels to them all. Let me know which kick-ass gals float your boat.

Wishing you all the shoes in the world,

Shoe Gal

When Fievel went West...

2010-03-10T01:33:00.000-05:00

Well, to the West Village anyway.

He hopped on at 14th street, much to the surprise (and my delight, girly screams from some of the men folk) of the other passengers and proceeded to try to find a seat. But no one would offer one up to him. Go figure!

He scurried throughout the car as we all got started a frenzied rendition of the "wave" with our legs.

Girly screams ensued.

Just as he hopped on, he hopped off at West 4th Street.

Where he was going is anyone's guess....Chuck E. Cheese perhaps?

Ok, I'll stop while I'm (barely) ahead.

My adventure across the bridge...

2010-03-09T00:17:00.000-05:00

I am a big city livin' gal in case you didn't know and today I did something for the first time. Something I haven't done in the five plus years I have inhabited my great metropolis.

I crossed the bridge.

I know most of you are thinking, "Shoe Gal, big stinkin' deal, I cross bridges all the time!"

True, but in the city I live in, we tend to stick to our borough and don't venture too often across the many bridges that connect the city to the other world. What can I say, we're borough snobs.

But I was feeling adventurous today so I told Mr. Converse to strap on, well, his converse and hightail it with me over the bridge to explore.

And we did.

We started out having a lovely brunch at a restaurant on the water.

Check out the nifty fifty placemat

The food was yumlicious.

I had the most light and fluffy banana walnut pancakes my mouth ever had the pleasure of meeting. I could have taken a nap on them.

Now all together, "hmmmmmmm"

Mr. Converse had his usual, Eggs Benedict. I caught him practically licking the plate afterwards though. I can't take him anywhere!

Delish

After brunch, we headed out to look at the water and wave to our city across the pond before continuing our across the bridge adventure.

We then decided to throw caution to the wind and just explore not paying attention to what direction we were headed in. We came across the most scrumptious candy store. My head was telling me to go in, my hips not so much. Needless to say, my head won. I mean, come on, there was chocolate involved and a gal knows never to say no to chocolate, right?

The ceiling was decorated in huge lollipops a la Willy Wonka's Factory

There was a huge dog made out of candy. I may have seriously considered taking a nibble at which point I am sure I would have been asked to never frequent this particular store of candy again. Thankfully, I got distracted thinking how many sour peach rings I could fit in my mouth before Mr. Converse left me across the bridge forever. I would say at least 20. I have a large yapper.

And then there was this.

Doesn't that just make you all tingly inside? No? Just me I guess.

Love and Shoes,

Shoe Gal

May I introduce you to...

2010-03-07T22:45:00.002-05:00

My better half. The yin to my yang. My killer of spiders. My chocolate acquirer. My personal comedian.

Ok, enough with the mushy stuff.

Meet my hubby, Mr. Converse. Why you ask? Well like his other half, Shoe Gal, Mr. Converse enjoys a good shoe, well... a good pair of Converse. But who doesn't?

Mr. Converse sportin' his American Flag Converse shoes

Some fun tidbits about Mr. Converse...

He regularly gets recognized on the street - for who, we haven't figured out yet. But people seem to think he is that actor in that thing they can't remember the name of. But he isn't. He hasn't acted a day in his life. In fact, Adrien Grenier and Chloe Sevigny swear they know him. But they don't. He just has one of those faces.

He is an exceptionally talented artist - a filmmaker by trade, he puts pen, pencil, paintbrush to paper and creates awesomeness. He is incredibly modest, so I have to toot his horn for him. I'll share some of his work soon, I promise.

I know he'll make a lot of guest appearances in High Heel Hijinks in the future so I figured proper introductions were in order.

Mr. Converse meet blog world. Blog world, meet Mr. Converse.

Hope you had a shoetastic weekend!

Shoe Gal

It's a bloggy blog world...

2010-03-03T00:50:00.000-05:00

Dear God, it's me Shoe Gal.

And by Dear God, I mean Lordy Lordy Lord. What have I gotten myself in to?

Probably not the best way to open up the very first post of my brand spakin' new blog, but for everyone reading (and by everyone, I mean "hi, Mom"), I have been sweating in places a dignified gal should not be sweating thinking about how now the blogging world (and by blogging world, again "hi, Mom") will know my deepest, darkest secrets. And it's by my choice no less!

And by secrets, I mean now you'll know that this gal has been known to eat a whole wheel of brie on her own in one sitting and with no civilized support players like bread or crackers. And guess what? Since no one was there to see me, the calories don't count. You follow that philosophy, right?

You'll probably find out that I own an obscene number of shoes and most days not a shoe goes on my feet (but that's for a whole other post).

You may even get out of me that on any given day, I work with some of the most interesting yet equally mind boggling individuals - this has included a stripper, demonologist, famous world peace leader, ex-convict, crooked politician, British Royal and Celtic harpist to name a few.

And even though the thought of sharing these deep dark "secrets" with you all scares the bejesus out of me, I hope you'll stick around and laugh at my neurosies, my stories, my life. I mean hey, if you can't laugh at a complete stranger, who can you laugh at?

Viva la shoes!

Shoe Gal